Dealing with addictions is one of the most challenging things people can do. Whether the problem is food, alcohol, drug abuse, or any other form of addiction, it is a cruel reality that some people never break out of this dangerous habit. A significant aspect of their recovery is how their family and friends treat them. If you have a loved one who is an addict, you need to know what to do and what not to do around them. One thing you must learn is how to stop enabling someone's addiction.

The difference between enabling and helping

The role of the family in addiction recovery should be to help. However, there is a very thin line between enabling someone's addiction and trying to help them. Luckily, there is an easy way to distinguish one from the other:

• if you are doing things that the person could do themselves if they were not an addict, you are enabling their addiction;
• doing anything that the addict cannot do themselves is helping;

It may sound confusing at the moment, but we will explain this more thoroughly.

An example of enabling someone's addiction and helping out

Let's say that we have a person with a severe drinking problem. They fear they might lose their job if they show up drunk today, so they ask you to lie in their stead and let the office know they are sick and cannot show up today. If you do this thinking that you are helping them keep their job, you are actually enabling their addiction.

However, if you refuse to do this and let them face the consequences, you are helping them. Until they realize the downsides and see what their addiction is causing, the recovering individual will never take the decisive step. If losing their job is the necessary trigger that will make them seek help, you need to let it happen. There are ways to find employment for people in recovery, so do not feel guilty for doing the right thing.

The addict must face the consequences of their actions

We have given a short example of how important it is to let a person struggling with addiction face the consequences of their addiction. This may be a wake-up call before it is too late. The worst thing you can do is to provide a safety net they can rely on. It sounds harsh, but it is a necessity.

Providing a safety net means you are shielding the struggling individual from the harsh truth. They can never understand how dangerous their behavior is until they feel the consequences on their own skin.

Do not lend money to a person dealing with addiction

A person with addiction does not have control over their actions or spending habits. Lending them money will only provide financial stability they don't deserve. Thus, do not give them resources to buy whatever they are addicted to.

You need to be strict and firm when it comes to not lending money. It is all for their own good.

Do not take over any responsibilities on yourself

If your loved one is battling addiction, do not take over any of their responsibilities. Do not clean after them, buy them food, prepare meals, wash their clothes. They need to live their life on their own. It is the same as stopping them from dealing with the consequences of their addiction.

Do not rescue the person from legal issues

Another essential point is to let the person deal with the legal issues caused by their addiction. It can be difficult because you don't want your loved ones to go to jail. However, this is yet another example of a possible trigger that may make them seek help.

Know how to behave in the presence of an individual struggling with addiction

If your loved one had an episode recently, there are a couple of different ways to react. You can scold them and let your emotions dictate your behavior. It is also enabling their addiction, and here is why. If a person is used to doing bad things when under the influence of a mind-altering substance, they may feel a little remorse if they are scolded afterward. They might even think that's their punishment, and now they can return to doing whatever they did before.

If you don't react and calmly speak with them, it may wake up a sense of guilt. There is no scolding, so the person cannot feel like you are punishing them. Whatever negative you say, they may see that as a form of "verbal spanking". However, if you don't show any emotion and remain quiet, they will be left with themselves. The person knows they did something bad, but no one is punishing them. So, they stay alone with their actions.

Set boundaries and stick to them

When you make specific rules regarding their addiction, like "no drinking in the house," you need to stick to those rules. Do not back down and let them walk all over you. They need to respect you and your rules.

How to help a person struggling with addiction?

The first thing to do is read about their addiction. Learn as much as you can, and try to understand what they are going through. Next, research different manipulation tactics that addicted people use and be ready to face them. If you recognize a situation, know how to respond to it.

In some cases, a change of location is necessary to start making a change. However, moving can be difficult for a person in recovery. So, to mitigate that, do not attempt a DIY move. There are many traps of this kind of relocation. If your loved one is willing to make a change, you need to be there as their emotional support. Therefore, let professionals deal with the technicalities. Learn more about the best practices for helping a recovering individual relocate to a new environment. Furthermore, learn how to create a safe environment, so they do not come in contact with whatever is the source of their addiction.

Stop enabling someone's addiction and start helping them instead

We hope that this short guide will teach you how to stop enabling someone's addiction. We want to help you so that you can help your loved one. Be patient but firm. This approach may seem strict, but that does not mean you should leave them on their own. Just know when to be there for them and when to back down and let them face the consequences.

META DESCRIPTION: Here is how to stop enabling someone's addiction and help them recover. Unless they face the consequences, they will never make a change.

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